Joker at Hogwarts
by telmios
Summary: A series of one shots the will feature the Joker as the New Divination teacher at Hogwarts. Some other familiar characters will come into play and Hogwarts won't know what hit them. 1st Chapter: Harry comes back to Hogwarts.
1. Chapter 1: Harry comes back to Hogwarts

Harry looked around the great hall as he entered trying to see what had changed. Coming back to finish his schooling hadn't been what he wanted to do after the war was over, but Hermione insisted and he couldn't tell her no or just leave Ron to deal with her on his own. So, here he was yet again. Only now, everything would be different.

It was strange coming in with the rest of the years and being a technical 8th year this year, he didn't know what to think of it all and honestly just wanted to get through the year as fast as possible. It seemed that a lot of their year had declined to come back since he didn't spot many of them as his eyes skimmed the house tables. He really wasn't surprised, since many had lost family or was just going strait to a job instead of coming back.

The only things in the hall he could see that were extremely different through, were all at the head table. There were a lot of new teachers at the table this year. A female that couldn't be much older than he was was sitting at the table and chatting wildly to Flitwick. She had Blond hair and was wearing a ruby robe with black diamonds sprinkled across it. Her hair was in pigtails. A male that was watching the students with a slightly crazed look in his eyes that worried Harry. The man was dressed in robes that could rival Dumbledore when he was still alive, Royal Purple, that bled into Neon green at the sleeves and bottom, with bright golden buttons and pinstripes that seemed to shimmer slightly in the candle light of the hall. His hair was just as bad, Neon Green, and slicked back. Lastly, he was extremely pale and had lips so red, Harry could have sworn he was wearing makeup. Yet, those were only two out of the many new teachers and it made Harry think of things he would rather not remember right now.

As the rest of the students finally got settled in, the sorting started, "Grayson, Dick" He listened only slightly and clapped for each student no matter what house they went too, "Slytherin!"

"Isley, Pamela...Hufflepuff!"

"Nygma, Edward...Ravenclaw!"

"Trent, Lucas...Slytherin!"

Once the sorting was over, Professor Mcgonagall stood up, "Welcome to another year at Hogwarts. This year is going to be a hard one as we all try to adjust to the changes we have gone through in the last year, but we will prosper," she stopped and smiled at the students for a second.

"Now, on to announcements, first, last years 7th years, have been given the opportunity to return this year as an extra class of eighth years that will take classes with the seventh years. Second, we have a lot of new teachers this year. First, taking over Potions, Professor Quinn,"

The blond with Pigtails stood up and waved in a friendly manner to the students.

"Taking over DADA this year, will be Professor Wayne,"

A Tall man in a black tailored robes nodded politely to everyone.

"And lastly, Professor Trelawney has decided to retire," at this the students let out a collective sigh, "and in her place we have Professor Joker taking over. The class is still in the same room for everyone who already knows the location."

At the the man with green hair stood up and grinned at them. Harry felt a chill go down his spine and judging by the looks on the others faces, many of them did too.

"Why, hello students," the man said in a unusual voice as he stood up and took a sweeping bow, "I look forward to our...short, times together this, Beautiful, school, year."

Mcgonagall watched him sit back down, then proceeded with the usual announcements, but at this point Harry didn't hear anything, he was watching the new Divination Professor, something about him just didn't seem...right.


	2. Chapter 2: The Laugh of a Mad Man

Some days were harder then others in his opinion. Today was one of those days. Looking around the dark classroom with black curtains over the windows and dark red beanbag chairs sitting around short round tables, the frown on his face just deepened. All the seats were full and here he was at the from to teach these little twerps about the magic of Divination. Today would not be a... pleasant day for them.

"You all expected to come in here and see my crazy face laughing and grinning, like usual, But...," he sighed quietly and looked up down a bit of anger and spite creeping into his voice, "you would be wrong."

Standing up slowly still looking at the floor, he could feel the eyes of the students widen as he talked quietly, "Today you will all close your eyes and try to remember the worst thing that has ever happened to you and when you do, laugh, LAUGH!" He screamed the last word, his head coming up sharply and his eyes wide and frightening.

"Laugh till you can't breath, till you feel your whole body locking up for Air!... Then laugh some more because when you are done, you will feel better then you ever have."

He smiled his maniacal smile at them all and spread his arms wide.

"You will forget it all and every time it comes back, Just Laugh, and you will be fine. Well, as fine as anyone can be who has a reason to laugh like me," At this his smile grew wider if possible and then he started cackling.

His voice started low and long, then slowly got higher till it was ear splitting and fast.

Harry never forgot that lessen. The laugh a mad man that followed his dreams.


End file.
